-フローレス パッション-

「毎日楽しいの為に」 Flawless Passion

A Snapshot of Thoughts #3 – May 20th, 2017

Prior to coming to Japan, I had believed that there is no such thing as a wasted effort. Everything I have done had a purpose and will connect together at some point to mean something in some way. That was a motivation message I took to heart from Danny Choo, a person that played a role in my exposure to Japan. Those words were true. That was how I came to learn Japanese, by simply doing what I loved and immersing myself in my hobbies. Every moment I spent watching anime, reading in games, listening to broadcasts, and singing songs formed my language skill level today. Never had I thought I would be become this fluent in Japanese.

In other moments of my life, the things I have done and spent time on may not have led to an accomplishment, but they definitely resulted in something, such as connecting to a new hobby or met new friends. Or sometimes just plainly, I had fun. Many things in my life were all by chance, coincidences stacked upon coincidences through the decisions I made and eventually took its shape into what is my life. I am everything I have ever done.

But, I recently begin to question the thought that there is no such thing as a wasted effort. I ask myself, what was my time in Japan in the last 7 months for? What has it accomplished me and contributed to? I lost a friend, used up my brother’s and parent’s money, and still I am exhausting my time. What I have gained were the engravings of loneliness, despair, and dread into my soul, getting a taste of the life of all work and no free time, simply surviving the day and envied those who can afford food. Is going through these feelings again and again necessary for something? What do these experiences lead to? What am I suffering for? With regards to positive events, I attended my first ever gunpla expo and saw Kawaguchi Meijin in person, watched the impactful SAO movie in theaters, and now being able to hang out in Japan with another close friend. They were fun and inspirational moments. But could I make something out of them?

I feel and fear that the path I am walking on may be a dead end. The best that I can think of is that my time in Japan up until now were there to make me reconsider the future that I truly want to pursue. However, I cannot see beyond that.

A Snapshot of Thoughts #2 – April 29th, 2017

In the movie ひるね姫 ~知らない私の物語~, there was a scene where the protagonist, ココネ (Kokone, a high school girl), was told by an old man to not waste any time in life because life is short. Kokone replies by asking when did life started to feel short because she feels that life is incredibly long and distant.

Ever since then, I too wondered the same. Life should be long and distant. But for me right now, life seems short and time passes fast. To answer Kokone’s question, life and time started to feel short around when I was graduating from university. The possible reasons why are plentiful, and I don’t have an exact answer I decided upon yet.

What I do know however, is that I want to regain that feeling I had lost with respect to the passage of life and time, to once again live at my own pace, to stand in the position of Kokone’s outlook on life. //Continue Reading//

四月の購入物 April Loots – 2017


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This month, I had loots coming from various sources: purchases made in stores, bonuses from movie theaters, online orders, and also gifts from friends. Most of the items this month were unplanned purchases that I just happened to stumble upon by chance, and given the opportunity of crossing paths with me, I had to buy them.

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「小さな幸せの味わい」 – Struggles in Japan 7 – April 2017

This month was far from smooth sailing. The seas were rough and the storm is still ongoing. However, I am here. I found a path to survival. My situation has improved. My wish and dream of attaining a stable daily life and to live together with friends, was realized in an unexpected way. Although a small version of what I had envisioned, this small happiness alone took me 7 months to reach. A taste of what I want to achieve.

I have moved into my friend March’s place where a room had opened up. It was the house I used to be in when I first arrived in Chiba but then I moved out for a modern apartment, and now I am back. Having an entire room to myself, plus being friends with the housemates now, it is not bad. But of course, the world would not let me have it easy. Circumstances arose and this house would be closed down at the end of the month. I had only just moved back in and now in a few weeks, we all have to leave. I will enjoy my time here as much as I can. //Continue Reading//

Room at Parent’s Home – 2015

Finally, my 4 years of college ends and now I must move back to my old room at my parent’s place in the bay area. Prior to moving back in, I went through a great deal of effort to renew the interiors of the room, the process of which you can see over here in this page.


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The view you are presented with upon entering the room. Feel free to compare this 2015 version of my room to how it was in 2012.

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神のみぞ知るセカイ 完読感想

神のみぞ知るセカイという漫画を知ったのはこのブログを始めた前よりの話、7年以上も前のことです。ギャルゲーが好きな僕にとっては面白い漫画だした。第1巻が発売されたのは2008年の7月。そして最終巻である26巻が発売されたのは2014年の6月。若木先生、お疲れ様です。いつ神のみの1巻を手に取って読んだのかはもう忘れてしまったが、このシリーズを完読したのは今日、2017年の4月下旬。いやぁ、いつも最新巻が発売した直後に買っていたのに、読むのを3年間も遅れててとても申し訳ない気分です。まぁ、僕の話はさておき、神のみぞ知るセカイを完読してからの感想を書きたいと思います。あ、もちろんネタバレがあると思うので、この漫画を読んでいない人はご注意ください。(っていうか読んで行ってくださいよ…おすすめのシリーズです。) //続きを読む Continue Reading//

A Snapshot of Thoughts #1 – April 19th, 2017

Originally, I was going to take a photo of a sakura tree, of which the flowers have mostly fallen off by now, as an example to show how things keep on slipping by in my current life. Spring came and the sakura bloomed. If it was me several years ago, I would have been excited, going around places taking photos of the flower to upload onto this blog. Even now, I reminisce about the moments I spent in Kyoto during spring 2012. This year, this time in Japan, I have not taken a single photo of them. The sakura petals have fallen and they are gone now. Much like my inability to take photos of the sakura on time, other things in my life simply keep on slipping by. The reasons and scenarios were various. Anyways, I thought I was too late to yet another event.

But today, I saw these flowers at a park nearby. I admit. I don’t know what these flowers are. However, they fulfilled the same role as sakura in my heart, beautifully vivid pink trees in full bloom during spring. This wasn’t quite what I had imagined, but this alternative will do. I dreamed of living together with friends in Japan, hanging out, buying things, and engaging our hobbies. My life right now isn’t quite what I had imagined… but perhaps… this alternative might do.
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MG ガンダムエクシア 製作その⑫ 【武装】 MG Gundam Exia – WIP 12– [Weapons]

The weapons are always what I build last for any model and this MG Gundam Exia was no exception. The blue parts for the armors and weapons were painted on separate occasions, so I was quite surprised at how I was able to mix the exact same color without any trouble. The color, or more accurately the texture, of the frame pieces for the weapons though, was harder to match with the rest of the body, which was originally painted many years ago. //続きを見る Continue Reading//

MG ガンダムエクシア 製作その⑪ 【青い外装】 MG Gundam Exia – WIP 11 – [Blue Armor Pieces]

At long last, I now have the skills and ability to challenge what to me was the most difficult part of building this Master Grade Gundam Exia, painting the blue armor pieces in the color I envisioned. For years since I began building Gundam models, I only had access to a limited selection of colors from spray paints oriented for DIY use. But now I have access to an airbrush along with the proper paints for hobby use, thanks to my friend Blitz-X.

These are the pieces in question. A couple years prior, I had tried to work with a couple of the pieces but given up. First, I needed to undo the damages done, and then prepare the rest of the blue armor pieces. //続きを見る Continue Reading//

MG ガンダムエクシア 製作その⑩ 【白い外装】 MG Gundam Exia – WIP 10 – [White Armor Pieces]

For far too long, my build of my first Master Grade, Gundam Exia, had remained on hiatus. At the time of the last work-in-progress, I was facing the dilemma of what to do with the colored armor pieces, which were not going so well. The conclusion was that I simply did not have the ability to work with those parts in the way that I want to. I lost a fair amount of motivation and thus Gundam Exia remained boxed up in storage.

A couple years later in 2015, my modeling skills had improved, but more importantly, I met my good friend Blitz-X. Coincidentally, he was also building his own Master Grade Exia, so we thought it would be cool if we both worked on our Exia concurrently. My motivation returned, and the first step was to finish all of the white armor pieces.
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